Friday, October 17, 2008

Where's Mom When You Need Her?

I was beginning to wonder, and now it is officially confirmed: there is no such thing as common sense anymore.

In the old days . . . like when I was a little girl . . . my mom instilled common sense in me. She’d tell me things like, “Bundle up, it’s cold out there!” or “Wear your seatbelt!” or “Eat a good breakfast before school.”

Mom had a lot of common sense. She still does. She recently went on a trip to Europe, but stopped at my house first. When she was here I got to look inside her suitcase and saw that she packs every outfit for her trip in a Ziplok bag—one of those big ones they make now. Isn’t that great?! Such practicality.

I guess mothers today are not doling out common sense the way they used to because more and more I see stories on the news that just make me scratch my head.

“Like, DUH!” I want to scream when I see a story telling people to put all of their underwear in the same drawer so that like things are in the same place. Or to change their sheets every so often to prevent bed bugs. You know, just the every day, common sense stuff of life.

So I just had to laugh out loud when I opened my computer this morning to the most recent headlines. Were they anything about the economy or the election? Nope.

One of the stories was about stick bugs. They’re long.

One was about "energy" food to keep you going all day long. Eat a healthy breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Drink water. (My mom could have told the nation that one!)

And the one I loved the most that made me guffaw with laughter was about the latest threat to our health: cell phone rash.

Yes, you read it right. Cell phone rash. You know, that itchy, burning rash you get on your face and ear from holding your cell phone there too much. Haven’t heard of it? Me neither. Until today.

There it was, the ominous headline: “Doctors Warn of Cell Phone Rash.”

I read it out loud to B who said, “Gee, all they need to do now is put the word ‘syndrome’ after it and we’d have a national crisis on our hands.” He’s right. Can’t you just see the ensuing panic?

You would think that normal people, who can figure out how to actually work a cell phone, would be able to figure out that if you regularly repeat a motion and it eventually makes your skin break out in little bumps that they should stop said repetitive motion. Right?

Wrong.

Apparently our society today needs a little hand holding. Somebody to knock a little common sense into their heads.

Apparently our society needs a mom.

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